‘It takes confidence to break the rules’

To mean queer means the freedom to be as “weird” as your heart desires. I think that’s why conservatives hate us so much, we get to live out their wildest dreams & darkest fantasies like it’s everyday life.

I identify as PRINCE! I don’t feel the need nor the obligation to anyone (besides who I’m fucking) to clarify. I’m androgynous. I’m very in touch with both male & females sides of myself.

I’ve always just been obsessed with being pretty. That translates beyond gender. As I’ve gotten older pretty has evolved into sexy, as such my style has as well.

I’m a mission kid, very similar to an army brat I’ve lived all over. Born in Morocco, moved to Atlanta when I was about 5, then settled in Louisville around middle school. No matter where I go in the states, Louisville always feels like home tho. It’s slow enough to build a practical life, yet fast enough to explore your options while doing so. I love being apart of the city’s growth as opposed to going to a bigger more established city tryna find your footing.

I’d tell anyone struggling with their identity to just be themselves. There’s no rule book on the game of life, but I guaran-Fucking-tee, it sucks getting to the end of it and realizing how much time and energy you wasted trying to please everyone but yourself. I’ve been there. Coming from a strict ass religious(mission) family, having 4 older brothers, moving to the south. All I wanted, all I tried to do was be a normal “boy” but that’s not who I am. I’ve always beat to my own drum. I was the first boy cheerleader in elementary school. I used to design and sew my own Barbie clothes. Even started my own business selling doll outfits in the 3rd grade. Happiness lives where honesty begins. Free yourself, live your best life. Fuck whoever doesn’t get it, it’s YOUR life.

I carry myself fearlessly, I think that’s a very literal interpretation of my identity. It takes confidence to break the rules. It takes balls to be a “boy” in daisy dukes, no matter how hard I have to hide them. I love myself, and I think that’s one thing that’s been consistent in my life. My bravery, my confidence, in myself.

I see the queer community as very cliquy, and almost segregated honestly. For us to be a rainbow, we lack diversity as a whole. The queer community (much like the black community) could rule the world, if they just stopped feeding into the stereotypes they used to fight against. I wish we supported each more outside of PRIDE. I wish we loved each other more outside of white straight male Americans standard of beauty. Don’t get me wrong, the queer community is definitely making moves to make sure we’re represented, just not has strong a force as I feel we could be. Gay people also need to free Nowhere and other spaces that we helped make popular as they no longer cater to our culture. It’s time for us to create a new wave of energy, as we control what’s cool!

We have to stop supporting businesses that don’t cater to our power. We bring people, we bring money, we bring creativity & energy. That’s something you truly can’t put a value on. We need to support queer events & queer curators more. It isn’t easy being a POC queer androgynous kid in Kentucky. On paper the odds are definitely stacked against me, but created a land to myself. I don’t look for acceptance from anyone, and I think people gravitate towards that. I try to create spaces that are all inclusive, and I think my events reflect that. Rather I’m providing a twerk fest dance party or a mental health support group, I want any & everyone to feel welcomed, appreciated, & valued.

I don’t really feel excluded for anything mainstream, as I’ve somehow made my way by my own rules into that space. I’d say I’m more aloof to people, like they know of my existence, but they don’t really know me. I often show up to parties by myself, but know everyone at them. I was the first “boy”/androgynous mermaid at Forecastle, and it was amazing. They really believed in me, as I’ve participated in party cove a few times. And it was a wild experience. I made my own costume, and it was definitely over the top. But I tell you what it was so much love in the crowd! They didn’t give a shit if I was a guy or a girl, they just loved that I loved them being there. I think the world could use more of that in all communities.

I feel at my best… Most of the time. I know that’s kinda corny, but it’s true. I’ve been on a spiritual, self care journey over the last year, & I’m truly happy in my skin. Everyday. Not all day everyday, but everyday. I’ve never felt more focused on my creative projects, I’ve never felt more loved by my family & friends, I’ve never felt more sexy, or confident.

My biggest life influence is my Mama Critt (my grandmother). She was this beautiful creole woman, with impeccable style, gorgeous flowing silver hair, and a sassy ass attitude that would rival any Dynasty diva. I remember everything always being perfectly coordinated. The earrings had to match the necklace, the clutch had to match the shoes, it was always a spectacle to watch her get ready. She drove a mint green Cadillac, and everyone in town knew her. They still do. She was a double amputee, both legs below the knee. It was hard to watch her go through that change. But she was a fighter, much of where I get that attitude from. It was the late 90’s early 00’s and the technology isn’t what it’s like today. She hated her new flat legs, so she marched into her doctors office demanding legs she could wear her heels with. And I’ll be damned if she not only got them, but she walked in the no assistance. Slow mind you, but she was walking. I remember being a kid so inspired by her audacity, to still want to feel like her true self. No matter what life threw her way. I miss her greatly, but I know she glows from within everything I am. A fabulous, intelligent, radiant, unapologetic, Black Kween!